Cwis Gives Advice

Up today I have a letter from my inbox. Many of you know you can communicate with me directly at abysitter@gmail.com. Some of you do. Some of you have found out I am not the best at replying. I prefer texting, but get too many texts from people who don't even begin to explain who they are. So communication with me just sucks in general.

Today I am going to post an email I received. This is an email someone wrote to me to solicit advice. They did give permission for me to post it. I'm not saying I'm going to become a diaperboy advice columnist, lol, but if anyone else has an ABDL question, don't ever be afraid to hit me up...

And if you have any additional advice for this person, please leave a comment - especially if your advice differs from mine.




Dear Cwis,

I have a problem and could use some advice.

I am a 19 year old college ABDL. I would say I'm 75% DL, 25% AB. Still, most of my pictures make it look like I'm 100% AB. And that's where I got into trouble.

A few years ago I started communicating with a daddy. He told me when I started college he would pay for me to come and spend spring break with him. I thought, it could be fun to visit somewhere new during spring break, and I thought maybe this would be the daddy experience that would indicate whether or not I am more AB than I thought.

Last year I flew there for spring break. I spent less than a day in diapers, being babied a little, before "Daddy's" thoughts turned to sex. And from that point on he became relentless.

Now this is probably my fault, because we didn't talk about this at all before I flew there, and I probably should have set ground rules from the beginning. But everything he'd ever said to me either suggested he wanted to baby me or just that he thought I was cute. We never talked about "popping my cherry" or "fucking my tight hole" - but that's what he wanted to do once I got there.

It's hard to feel like a baby when someone wants to fuck you. In the and we didn't have sex, and he got angry and took me to the airport after only two days. I had to pay fees to fly back early, and it cost me an extra $150. I had to have an aunt wire me the money. That was probably the most humiliating experience of my life.

Spring break is coming up again, and this is why I am writing. Recently, one of my friends in this community told me that he is going to visit the same state to see a daddy during spring break. He is 18, a virgin, and thinks he is going to get babied there.

I was embarrassed last year, so when people ask me how my trip went, I lied and told them it was fun. Truthfully, for half a day, it was. My friend might be going to see the same person I did but I don't want him to know what happened to me because I wasn't truthful with him before. At the same time, I feel like I should warn him. I know he reads your blog nearly every day. Can you warn him for me?

- Anonybaby

PS: the "daddy" already warned me last year that if I told people why I didn't want to stay he would say I stole from him, and that's why I only stayed two days.



Anonybaby,

First of all, let me say that what happened to you really sucks. As someone who has provided first-time babysitting services for more than a few members of our community, I can tell you that many people in our world are as concerned with the experience the other person as they are with their own. You obviously found someone who doesn't give a fuck.

And before I go further, it is definitely NOT your fault.

I am familiar with more than a few people within our community who could be the person you described. Our community is full of people of all ages who are good, and honorable. And for every "creepy old man" there is a "young whippersnapper" on the comeup looking to use someone older as their meal ticket. So I don't want what I am going to say to be taken the wrong way by anyone.

Our community does have diaper snipers: daddies who wait for boys to turn 18 and then BOOM! are on their ass like a diaper. We have some fast moving daddies, too; I've had people post pictures on my blog and literally be hit up within an hour by at least one or two of them. When I get new pictures from someone hot, I sometimes will warn them to watch their inbox for it.

In 2006 I paid for a member of our community to take a bus across the country to return to his parents. He had been the victim of one of these so-called daddies, spending time in diapers for many years, and he was only 20 at the time. I've since talked to so many people who have similar stories it's not even funny. There are a lot of good, honorable men within the world of ABDL. But, unfortunately, not all of them.

Your friend could be going to visit the same person. Or, he could be going to visit someone who may as well be the same person. Or, he may be going to visit someone who is decent and good. It's hard to tell, and since he hasn't shared more information with you - and you don't want to inform him of your exact situation - I would just point him in the direction of this blog and what him know Cwis has some advice for him.

And that advice is this:

Before you fly across the country to spend time being babysat by someone you've never met, I want you to consider a few things.

• Do you know what you are getting yourself into? Have you talked to the person you are going to be meeting to find out what their expectations are and how far they are going to take things?

• Have you explained how far you expect things to go? Are there any areas you do not want to get into? If so, have you made them clear?

• Do you have a backup plan in case you are stood up (it's happened), kicked out (it's happened), or want to leave (it's happened - so many times)?

Sometimes, there is an expectation that the person paying for the ticket is owed something. And I could see where someone who pays for a plane ticket might get angry if he believes you were up for anything and then changed your mind. At the same time, it is your RIGHT to say no to anything you are uncomfortable with. And your RIGHT to change your mind.

Best case scenario: you pay for your own plane ticket. This way, there is no expectation that anyone owes someone else anything. If that's not possible, or if said ticket is already purchased, be damn sure you know what you are getting yourself into and all of the expectations and limitations are laid out before you travel.

I'll finish with this: I know more than a few people in our community who are messed up because their first interactions here were not with good people. Some of them have actually tried to quit wearing diapers because of it. If you are AB and into the toddlerization side, there's a chance that sex isn't even on your mind. If that is the case, be clear about it - and take it slow when it comes to meeting people.

Lastly, you might not be ready for that level of intensity at age 18.

Think it over.




Again, if you have any advice for this kid, comment below! And if you have an ABDL question and want me to take a stab at it: abysitter@gmail.com.  - C