I had the opportunity to FaceTime with my little bro,
ABenjaminButton, yesterday. He's living the dream, bouncing around Europe, spending time on a private island, crewing sail boats, and - well, you name it, he's doing it.
Seeing Ben's smile on my iPhone screen took me back to seeing it in person.
You may remember that he wrote me a 'thank you' letter upon graduating from high school.
He would be going to school in NY shortly after he wrote that letter, and I was living in Orlando. Still, we met in Orlando when he returned for holiday break in 2013 [
entry 1] [
entry 2] [
entry 3], and and he visited the cottage when I was in NY for my summer vacations
in 2014 and
2015.
At some point Ben became my 'little bro' on Fetlife. If you know me you know I don't throw around titles like 'little bro', 'big bro, or 'daddy'. I have two little bro's and one little, and while I'm up for new relationships, I do not like those who accumulate a collection of littles or create cliques. Ben was the first person who I considered a 'little bro', and seeing him on FaceTime today reminded me why.
I was looking through old pics of our summer vacations and I found this screenshot I'd taken at some point and long forgotten about.
Let me just mention that I love, love, love seeing things like that.
I'm not even sure how old this post was, but it goes back a while.
Seeing it again made me think: I've enjoyed creating amazing ABDL experiences for people for a long time. I grew up in a time before the internet was widely available, and even as I began to explore the ABDL community online, I found nothing but roadblocks:
flakes,
loons, and purgers at every turn. I remember this 'community' when I was a little trying to find the perfect experience with a big, and I remember it when I became a big and decided to try to do better, to create the experiences I'd never been fortunate enough to have.
I love that I've been able to create some amazing regression moments for people in our community, and I especially love hearing about them.
And I love that reading my blog entries has had an impact on people and their own regression growing up.
If a session with me, or my blog, has had an affect on you over the 9 years + I have been blogging, please don't be shy about letting me know - those types of things keep me going.
Here is Ben's letter, from all those years ago...
Love you, Ben,
Big Bwo
July 2, 2012
Dear Cwis,
My name is Ben and I've been following your blog for the past two years now. I just graduated high school, and amidst all of my thank you cards to friends and family, I wanted to reach out to you and thank you for what you've meant to me.
Like a lot of people out there, my discoveries into my own diaper fetish as well as my own sexuality have been a long drawn out process that have taken until now for me to fully understand, and more importantly be comfortable with. And I guess what I'm here to thank you for is just that: comfort. It wasn't until the past few years that I realized that I could be looking on the internet for information. And after going through hoards of sites that didn't exactly make me feel anymore normal, I found your blog. And even though the column was lined with guys getting changed , it was in your words that I found for the first time someone I could connect to. Reading your stories about your childhood and even your last one about Reese reminded me of events in my own childhood. And even though our ages are a bit farther apart, reading your words sounded like the same thoughts that went through my mind at different stages.
It's been a rough road discovering who I am and who I'm comfortable with being. I've still never told anyone about my diapers, or my sexuality. I'm actually pretty "normal" in my public life. And while I've tried searching on websites for people in my area I've never been able to find anyone in real life that I can openly connect with and talk face to face. I've also been wary of sharing information about myself to those in the online community, because I was worried of having my information exploited to thus force me out. But having read your material for the past few years I'm not only now more comfortable about my own feelings but I trust you as an individual. I guess that's why I've stuck to reading what you have to say because you've been a source of normality into what most would perceive as something very abnormal. Cwis, you've been a crucial element to my childhood and are the reason I am the man I am today.
Thank you, for everything,
ABenjaminButton
PS. It's ironic to me that not only have you been an hour away from where I lived my whole life (Orlando) but in the fall I'll be going to NYC for school.
