When Snuggies was still in the formation stages and trying to find investors I did quite a bit of promotional posts for them, both on my blog and via Twitter. Some people mistook my posts and tweets for my having an ownership stake in the would-be company, and I found myself explaining that my posts were just informational in nature and that I had no actual connection to the business. My purpose for sharing was two-fold: I post stuff of interest to the community all the time, and this was no exception; and, I saw the potential of Snuggies diapers - I was, after all, a huge fan of the Snuggies series of pasties by Vincent Vangoo back in the 1990s and early 2000s.
Most of you know the rest: Snuggies did, indeed, come to fruition. They designed and manufactured some diapers, and then improved them with various production runs. They eventually changed their name to Tykables - it appears that Snuggies and Huggies were a bit too close - and continued to put out product, even sponsoring some events (CAPCON, a play area at the Folsom Street Fair, etc.).
The company recently opened a physical store in a suburb of Chicago, and owner Todaler put out a video on YouTube inviting people to visit.
This did not sit well with the locals, somehow tipped off to the existence of this video, and they began to organize an opposition to the shop. Dozens of them converged on a village council meeting recently, demanding that the store be shut down.
Their reasons were the typical reasons given by anyone who doesn't have a full understanding of ABDL: sex may be happening inside... there's an elementary school just down the street... sex shops don't belong in a residential neighborhood... you've heard some of it before, so you get the idea.
This has, probably not surprisingly, been covered by local media. And now the story is getting picked up by the national media...
I've had a few people ask me to weigh in on this since the story first broke - whether I think it's good for the community, bad for the community, or catastrophic for the community. (I'm a bit late on this because my ABDL Photo/Story contest was going on until two days ago.)
I've heard from people who are angry that Tykables opened a physical store at all - some believe that our love for diapers belongs online, or in fetish shops, and not in shops they believe are fetish shops masquerading as nurseries or diaper stores.
I've heard from other people who are angry at the Mount Prospect, IL community - they believe that the shop has every right to be there, and that the townsfolk are nothing more uptight NIMBY's who are discriminating against a shop - one person called it a 'civil rights violation'.
And then, of course, there are positions in between.
I'm honestly undecided as to whether making the move to a physical store was a good idea.
That said, there are already adult nurseries in some cities, and have been for more than a decade. The idea that a store catering to our community would open in the U.S. one day is something that many of us have discussed for decades - Rearz, in Canada, already has a warehouse with a store within it, and we hoped for something similar here in the US.
That said, there are already adult nurseries in some cities, and have been for more than a decade. The idea that a store catering to our community would open in the U.S. one day is something that many of us have discussed for decades - Rearz, in Canada, already has a warehouse with a store within it, and we hoped for something similar here in the US.
There are a few mistakes I think the Tykables folks made, although hindsight is 20/20 in these things:
- The shop appears to have failed to consider restricting their business to those 18 and above at first, offering to do so if the local government requested it;
- They placed building blocks in the windows, which undoubtedly created a welcoming display, but was misinterpreted by some neighbors as an attempt to be "inviting to minors."
My regular readers alright know how I feel about keeping our community 18+, and I believe that this should have been something that the business was clear about right up front. There is no reason that any diaper company should be inviting anyone under 18 to shop in their store. There has been controversy lately about diaper companies creating marketing videos featuring minors in cartoon form, and diaper companies liking pictures of minors on Instagram:
This morning we were alerted to a rumor that we liked an inappropriate drawing on Instagram. Great way to start a Monday!— Bambino Diapers (@bambinodiapers) May 23, 2016
For all of the people willing to forgive - including those who believe that our community should be open to all ages - there are just as many who recognize that our community has been associated with pedophilia by those who lack an understanding of who we are and what we are about, and they point to things like those above as continuations of the stereotype.
I've seen pictures of the storefront, and I can sympathize with neighbors who are concerned that a gigantic wall of building blocks could make children believe that the store is "child-friendly." That obviously wasn't the intent, though - it appears that the wall was created to keep eyes outside the store from peering in.
All of that said, I think that Tod is doing a good job of getting out front of this. Offering to change the policy to 18+ is a good, if late, decision. And the company has agreed to have the window glass professionally frosted, and in the interim has covered the windows with white curtains, also a good decision.
I texted some advice to Todaler privately, as well as a bit of encouragement - regardless of what you may think about the decision to open a physical store and other aspects of that, he's found himself going from virtual obscurity to the public face of ABDL overnight. That's a lot of pressure, and I'm sure it will build as the story goes national.
Todaler seems to be doing his best to educate the media on the basics of ABDL. Some of the news articles I've seen have been far more respectful in their treatment than one would expect - I point you to the article by the Washington Post, above, as an example. The writer interviews Tod, and reports on the story from the points of view of a number of different folks involved with the story, including the village mayor.
It's not all roses:
Still, the article does a great job of trying to explain infantilism, as well - more than any other article I've seen on the Tykables controversy - and doesn't make a joke of us.
No punchlines = a win, to me at least.
The real debate amongst our community: is mainstream knowledge of ABDL a good thing for us.
I've always believed that positive portrayals of ABDL in the media has the potential to be a good thing. I remember seeing my first-ever Jerry Springer show featuring an ABDL - it was televised so long ago that I can't even find any references to it on the internet. But those screen grabs from the television show made the rounds on the diaper sites of the day, and this same debate raged: was a (very attractive) grown man in a diaper crawling around on Jerry Springer a good, or bad, look for us?
And by us, I mean diaper fetishists as individuals. Because we were a different community, then. So different. Hardly a community at all, really. (I'll write about that in an upcoming blog entry.) So as we fretted, we wondered how our family and friends would react if they ever saw it. The idea that it might affect a "community", per se, was hardly a concern - the idea that it might cause "us" - as individuals - some embarrassment, though, was very real.
Over time, though, I found that the episode airing in syndication, on repeat, did help. When friends found out I was into diapers they'd often reference the show as a way to say "I've heard of this, and I kind of understand it." The same when I would do "diapers for dough" - so, so often people who were hearing about it for the first time would say "okay, so diaper fetish - like that guy on Springer?"
Some of the ABDL portrayals on television since then haven't been nearly as kind to us, and I understand why people have a very real fear of any news of one of us appearing in front of the TV cameras, or any reference to infantilism in the media.
The Tykables 'scandal', so far, doesn't appear to be hurting us.
And if more people read the story and come away with an understanding of what diaper fetish is, it may well help us, on individual and community levels, in the future.
EDIT: I have to say, I think seeing stories about the Tykables store instead of the usual "diaper fetish" Google search results containing 1) hardcore porn sites and 2) child sex abuse arrests - often the results that pop up on the front page of any search for the term - would be an obvious plus.
I'll keep an eye on this story, as I'm sure we all will. But for the meantime I'll reserve passing judgment. As long as we continued to be portrayed as able to keep our very adult interests 18+, I think - I hope - we'll be okay.
Have an opinion on this? Email me: abysitter@gmail.com.
NOTE: Because I've been asked by a number of people in the past few days who remember the promotional posts, I'll clarify it again: not officially connected to Snuggies or Tykables in any way. Just a supporter of anyone trying to market a product to the community. But to those who expressed concern, thanks. You may want to send those same sentiments to Tod lol.
I've seen pictures of the storefront, and I can sympathize with neighbors who are concerned that a gigantic wall of building blocks could make children believe that the store is "child-friendly." That obviously wasn't the intent, though - it appears that the wall was created to keep eyes outside the store from peering in.
All of that said, I think that Tod is doing a good job of getting out front of this. Offering to change the policy to 18+ is a good, if late, decision. And the company has agreed to have the window glass professionally frosted, and in the interim has covered the windows with white curtains, also a good decision.
I texted some advice to Todaler privately, as well as a bit of encouragement - regardless of what you may think about the decision to open a physical store and other aspects of that, he's found himself going from virtual obscurity to the public face of ABDL overnight. That's a lot of pressure, and I'm sure it will build as the story goes national.
Todaler seems to be doing his best to educate the media on the basics of ABDL. Some of the news articles I've seen have been far more respectful in their treatment than one would expect - I point you to the article by the Washington Post, above, as an example. The writer interviews Tod, and reports on the story from the points of view of a number of different folks involved with the story, including the village mayor.
It's not all roses:
Speaking to the assembled residents at a village hall, Mayor Arlene A. Juracek called the business "a mayor's worst nightmare." She urged residents to avoid viewing William's promotional video, noting that it has a "big ick factor" and "you can't un-view it once you see it."
"It's a business that many people find at best distasteful, but that is legal and for which no zoning or village board approval is required," she said, noting that there were no code restrictions to justify a business license denial.
Still, the article does a great job of trying to explain infantilism, as well - more than any other article I've seen on the Tykables controversy - and doesn't make a joke of us.
No punchlines = a win, to me at least.
The real debate amongst our community: is mainstream knowledge of ABDL a good thing for us.
I've always believed that positive portrayals of ABDL in the media has the potential to be a good thing. I remember seeing my first-ever Jerry Springer show featuring an ABDL - it was televised so long ago that I can't even find any references to it on the internet. But those screen grabs from the television show made the rounds on the diaper sites of the day, and this same debate raged: was a (very attractive) grown man in a diaper crawling around on Jerry Springer a good, or bad, look for us?
And by us, I mean diaper fetishists as individuals. Because we were a different community, then. So different. Hardly a community at all, really. (I'll write about that in an upcoming blog entry.) So as we fretted, we wondered how our family and friends would react if they ever saw it. The idea that it might affect a "community", per se, was hardly a concern - the idea that it might cause "us" - as individuals - some embarrassment, though, was very real.
Over time, though, I found that the episode airing in syndication, on repeat, did help. When friends found out I was into diapers they'd often reference the show as a way to say "I've heard of this, and I kind of understand it." The same when I would do "diapers for dough" - so, so often people who were hearing about it for the first time would say "okay, so diaper fetish - like that guy on Springer?"
Some of the ABDL portrayals on television since then haven't been nearly as kind to us, and I understand why people have a very real fear of any news of one of us appearing in front of the TV cameras, or any reference to infantilism in the media.
The Tykables 'scandal', so far, doesn't appear to be hurting us.
And if more people read the story and come away with an understanding of what diaper fetish is, it may well help us, on individual and community levels, in the future.
EDIT: I have to say, I think seeing stories about the Tykables store instead of the usual "diaper fetish" Google search results containing 1) hardcore porn sites and 2) child sex abuse arrests - often the results that pop up on the front page of any search for the term - would be an obvious plus.
I'll keep an eye on this story, as I'm sure we all will. But for the meantime I'll reserve passing judgment. As long as we continued to be portrayed as able to keep our very adult interests 18+, I think - I hope - we'll be okay.
Have an opinion on this? Email me: abysitter@gmail.com.
NOTE: Because I've been asked by a number of people in the past few days who remember the promotional posts, I'll clarify it again: not officially connected to Snuggies or Tykables in any way. Just a supporter of anyone trying to market a product to the community. But to those who expressed concern, thanks. You may want to send those same sentiments to Tod lol.
