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CWIS'S NOTE: If you haven't read the first part of this saga, read up.
Road Trip: New York - Summer 2011
Mikey and Me - PartVIII
The next morning I woke up to find Mikey already out of bed. I yawned and stretched, rolled over, and climbed out of bed. I stepped into the bathroom and through to the kitchen, expecting to see Mikey at the table; he'd taken to sitting in front of my computer on the internet getting caught up on social networking he hadn't been able to do from the homeless shelter. No Mikey. I sighed, figuring he'd decided to move his sleeping up to the loft. I trudged up the spiral staircase and peered into the bedroom area - no Mikey. Hmm.
I walked back downstairs and looked around. A quick glance out the window found Mikey, seated in an Adirondack chair, laying back, smoking a cigarette. I grabbed a pair of shorts and walked outside, and then did a double-take as I noticed Mikey wearing - only a diaper!
"Wow, bro," I said.
He looked at me with a quizzical look on his face, like he had no idea what I was surprised by.
"Morning, Cwis!" he said cheerfully.
"You're in... a diaper."
"I told you I'd wear it all day for you," he replied, smiling.
"No, I mean... just a diaper."
"Oh, yea!" he said, grinning. "Why fuck with clothes, bro? A diaper's all I need."
I have to admit, just seeing Mikey sitting outside in a diaper got me hard. If you've been reading my blog for a while, you know I love, love, love public pictures. I love wearing in public and, while I don't have the courage of some of y'all who wear just a diaper on the subway or at the beach - and the jury is still out on the wisdom of that - I love seeing those pictures. So seeing Mikey, diapered and just hanging around outside? Mmmmhmmmmm.
Still, I did most of my diaper-only time at night, after dark, when a diaper and a swimsuit aren't as distinguishable. Mikey was out in morning, the sun beating down on us. Wow. I wondered what my neighbors would think if they saw him.
I wouldn't have to wait long to find out.
I'd already stepped back inside and put on some coffee when Mikey shouted out "Morning!" I looked outside and saw him standing up, waving to someone. Oh shit. He stepped inside and started laughing uncontrollably.
"Bro... the look... on that old man's face... when he saw I'm wearing a diaper..."
"Dude," I said, looking concerned. He rolled his eyes.
"If he says anything, just tell him I'm incontinent," Mikey told me. He pronounced the word wrong, and I had to laugh. I told him I didn't think the neighbor would believe me. "Who gives a fuck?" Mikey asked. "My health problems are none of his business. Besides, that dude looks ninety... he probably wears these, too!" He was still laughing. I peeked out the window and saw my neighbor looking over, trying to catch another glimpse of Mikey. Before I could warn against it Mikey walked outside, all the way to the edge of the deck, looking out over the lake. Fuck it. I joined him outside, kind of standing between him and the neighbor. The old man shouted out good morning to me, and I could see that at least he wasn't on the phone with 911. Sigh...
Mikey returned to his seat.
"I don't see the big deal," he told me. "You only get to come to the cottage a few weeks a year. If I were you I wouldn't be holding back anything. Just wear diapers bro. Let these people not look if they don't like it."
I tried to explain to him how diapers, as a sexual fetish, could be offensive to some people, and Mikey responded with FUCK 'EM! several times. I gave up. Besides, he looked adorable just chilling in his Pamper. I turned around and noticed him sucking on a pacifier, too, and it was too much - we both burst out laughing.
"All day, bro," he reminded me. "You get this all day long. And I'm taking this with me everywhere we go."
After we finished our coffee Mikey asked if we could go around the city and take some pictures. He was back on Facebook, and he wanted to have some pictures of him by the lake, and some other shots, to post up. I agreed. I offered to change him but he told me his plan was to wear the same diaper all day long.
"It won't last that long," I warned him. It was, after all, an Attend. He challenged me, arguing that it would. He'd see, I figured. I changed my own diaper and we both dressed, and then trudged up to the car.
"I just realized you left that sopping wet diaper on the porch," he told me. I stopped for a moment, but then realized that nobody was supposed to be visiting. Hopefully a wild animal wouldn't drag it away. We got in the car and headed into town...
As we drove Mikey asked me to regal him with a story about what an abysitting session might be like.
I'll be honest: I get asked this question a lot, and sometimes I get tired of answering it. I am usually more apt to link people to a blog entry I wrote about it in 2008 or 2009, and let them use their imagination for the rest. But sitting next to Mikey, who was riding around with a diaper on and a binky in his mouth, I decided to really share. I forgot for a moment that he actually read my blog, and I began from the beginning. I described a session from beginning to end, right down to the spanking I sometimes get into. Mikey had questions.
"So when you spank, does it... hurt?"
I laughed. I'd forgotten Mikey had promised to undergo a spanking. I nodded.
"A lot" I told him. I could hear him gulp for air.
"But I don't get it," he told me, serious for a moment. "Babies don't get spanked. At least, not if they have good parents. Why would someone who wants to feel like a baby come to you and then want you to spank them?"
"Well..." my voice trailed off. It was a complicated question.
"Unless they don't want you to, and you just do it because you want to?" Mikey continued.
"Noooooo..." I said. Although I had to admit to myself, that had probably sometimes been the case. Diapers-for-dough notwithstanding, though, most of my spankees were willing participants...
"So I don't get it," he pressed on. "If someone is all about feeling like a baby, why would they want to be spanked? Being hit with a paddle seems like the total opposite of feeling infantile."
So I explained how there are many, many facets to our fetish. How, for some, it is a desire to achieve an infantile state. And, for others, simply a desire to achieve a lack of control. And, for some, a desire to be humiliated, perhaps.
"I get that," Mikey told me. "I sometimes think it would be cool to be humiliated. By a girl. But what's so humiliating about diapers?"
I could see that Mikey was being totally serious, now, and I wanted to hug him. This was a dude who was willing to wear in public, noisily swishing down a hotel hallway. This was a dude who was willing to wear one out in the lake instead of a swim suit. This was a dude who was willing to stand up and wave to the neighbor wearing one. He wasn't humiliated at all. Wow...
I explained how some people are humiliated by diapers, and told him about the number of people whose parents use diapers to humiliate their children - and how that is one of the things that often manifests itself into a diaper fetish.
"I totally get that," Mikey interrupted at one point. "My mom used to try to use my rocking to embarrass me. She was frustrated that I wouldn't stop, so she'd bring it up in front of my younger brothers, in front of cousins and even my friends."
I suspected that the kind of humiliating experiences Mikey was thinking about probably paled in comparison to some of the stories I've heard from some of y'all, but I wasn't trying to make him feel bad, and I definitely didn't want to share those stories with him, so I simply nodded.
"Maybe that's why I still rock!" he told me, as though he'd had an epiphany. I nodded in agreement. "So like... your friends had to wear diapers as humiliation, and now they want to be humiliated by wearing diapers, I get that... but spanking?"
I tried my best to explain to him how a spanking can be one of the most humiliating things a person goes through. Mikey argued with me, telling me that he was pretty sure a spanking was just a spanking... nothing more. That didn't make sense to me, but I realized at one point he was talking tough... he was going to be experiencing a spanking soon.
By now we'd arrived at City Pier. It was time to go out for a walk on the pier. Mikey was dressed in some pretty thuggish jean shorts and some type of jersey, and as we exited the car he pulled his jersey off and tossed it onto the front seat. I locked the doors and stepped around the car, only to see him sagging. Massively sagging. There were probably three inches of disposable diaper exposed - including one of the baby blue Attends tapes!
"Uh, bro... your diaper is showing."
Mikey rolled his eyes.
"Okay?" he replied. "So?"
"Don't you want to put on your jersey?" I asked him. He shook his head and took off for the pier in kind of a jog. His jeans sunk even lower. I laughed and followed him. Mikey had hardbody status, and as he ran past a bunch of girls one of them whistled to him. He turned around, smiled, and waited for me. I could see the girls all giggling and looking at Mikey, and I wondered if they were laughing because he was wearing a diaper. I decided as I passed them that they were just nervous or something, because I could hear them whispering about how hot he was. The diaper didn't faze them at all - or they didn't notice it, at least.
Mikey read my mind.
"See, Cwis?" he said, laughing, after we were out of earshot of the girls. "I don't think people hear have the problem with diapers that you think they do. I think you should just strip down."
I laughed and shook my head. No...
"Want me to run your pants back to the car?" he asked me, sounding dead serious. I thanked him but declined. By now we were both laughing. As we walked past a couple walking back toward us with fishing gear Mikey turned to me and, in a normal conversational voice, asked me: "Do you hear that swishing? Is that your diaper, or mine?" My face probably turned red, and I saw the woman kind of slow a moment, and then keep walking. I wondered if they were turning around to check out our rear ends as we passed. I didn't have to wonder for long; Mikey turned around and walked backwards, and then began giggling. "They looked!"
I told him to chill out a little, and he shook his head in mock sadness.
"I'm sorry that you are so humiliated by having to wear diapers," he told me. "I'm not embarrassed at all."
"I just don't know if everyone needs to know about it," I told him. And with that Mikey pulled his jean shorts completely down, and began to pull them off. There was nobody right near us, but at any moment someone could turn and see, at the very least, that Mikey had no pants on. "If you take those off it better be because you're ready for your spanking," I told him. He quickly yanked his pants up and shook his head.
"I wanna feel babyish today, Cwis!" he told me, speaking baby talk. "No spanking yet!" He walked ahead and then turned around and looked at me. His pacifier was back in his mouth. I couldn't help but laugh...
After we'd taken some photos - no diaper pics, sorry haha - Mikey asked me if I was hungry. It was almost lunch time, and our breakfast had consisted of coffee. He suggested the Chinese Buffet restaurant we'd been to his first night in town, and I agreed. It was still nearly 100 degrees, and Mikey admitted the reason he wanted to go there was because they let you get your own soda.
"And I'm thirsty as fuck, Cwis," he told me. "I'm about to go ham on that soda fountain..."
And go ham he did. We each had a couple of plates of food, and I had a soda. Mikey had four or five. He even mixed orange soda with vanilla ice cream at one point, making some kind of dessert concoction. As he slurped on it he leaned in and looked at me, looking around to see who could hear.
"Cwis... I gotta go potty."
I burst out laughing. He'd tried to be quiet, but it was a little quieter in the restaurant at that moment for some reason, and I was fairly certain people behind him had heard. They stopped talking, and I put my finger to my lips.
Shhhhhhh, I scolded him. He feigned shame and looked down at the table.
"Sowwy," he whispered. "But I do."
I contemplated. I hadn't brought a diaper bag and, even if I had, I wasn't sure where I could even change Mikey. I hadn't really thought of him needing to go. Or being willing to wet a diaper again - I'd thought that was a one-shot deal. Hmm...
"Want me to just... go?" Mikey mouthed the words, but I understood them perfectly. I shook my head. Kid had just drank five sodas... I pictured him peeing so much that his little Attend couldn't handle the pressure. There'd be a puddle of piss on the floor in no time.
"Wait til we get in the car," I told him, realizing right away how that probably sounded to the people behind him. He laughed and told me okay.
We got in the car moments later, and I looked at Mikey. He was back to sucking on his pacifier, and it was adorable. Part of me wanted to put my hand on the front of his diaper and tell him to go, but part realized that could mean a wet seat - and, with temperatures back into the 100s, that would be a stank proposition. I suggested that we go back to the cottage so I could change him. Could he hold it that long. He assured me he could - but asked that I drive fast. I did.
We were driving down the road to the cottage - kind of a bumpy affair - when Mikey told me that all of the bouncing around was making him have to go even more. He asked if he should just go in his diaper. We were so close, so I suggested that he wait. I really had no confidence in those Attends haha...
As we pulled up to the cottage driveway I spied it: a car. My cousin's car. My cousin must have decided to surprise me - I fucking HATE surprises, something my family has never been able to grasp - and he had just shown up.
Mikey looked panicked.
"Who's that?" he asked me. I explained that it was my cousin, and that I was pretty sure they wouldn't stay long. Mikey shook his head. "I can't wait, Cwis... but I know they're going to hear this thing swish!"
Mikey's bravado was gone now. The dude who'd walked down the pier diaper showing, making loud remarks about diapers - he seemed to lose his nerve where it came to my family. I could understand that.
"What should I do?" he asked me. "Come down with you? Go hide somewhere? I don't know what you want me to do."
"What do you want to do?" I asked him. I reminded him that we were both wearing diapers - and that I had no choice but to go down see my cousin - and his wife, who I could now see in the window. (Nice... they'd let themselves in...)
Mikey's bravery had returned.
"Well, then, fuck it," he told me. "If you're going down, I'm going down."
"Are you sure?" I asked him. He nodded.
"What do I care? I may never even see these people again..."
That's what's up.
The two of us walked down the long driveway and up onto the front porch. I unlocked the door and we stepped in. My cousin and his wife were embracing each other. I quickly scanned the room. Powder on the couch. Pacifier on the table by the lamp. Baby wipes on the fridge. No diapers in sight... whew!
My cousin and his wife hugged me, and I introduced Mikey. They'd seen him online, and had even listened to some of his music - and they wanted to talk to him. He stood there, answering their questions, and I couldn't help but think how cute he looked, being all polite and respectful to them - even though his need to piss was probably stronger than ever.
Finally, after nearly ten minutes of them asking him music questions, I realized I really needed to help him out.
"Don't you have to go to the bathroom?" I asked him.
Mikey shook his head.
"No?" he said, sounding surprised by the question. I was confused. But then, as my cousin and his wife began to talk to each other about whatever next question they wanted to ask Mikey he looked directly at me and mouthed the words: I ALREADY WENT.
Wow.
I looked at the floor beneeath Mikey. No puddle... whew! I couldn't believe that he'd just stood there and pissed his pants in front of people as they talked. It was... hot as fuck. Yet, risky. He'd been wearing the same diaper since I'd changed him the night before - and it was a cheap-ass Attend. They aren't known for holding up to wear and tear. I was a little worried.
Then my cousin and his wife announced that they had to go. They actually wanted to give Mikey a hug, and as she pulled him closer I could hear the tell-tale crinkling. I wondered if they smelled urine. Mikey said goodbye and turned to walk out onto the deck and I spotted it: wetness - a lot of wetness - where the diaper had leaked onto the back of his pants.
If you're AB/DL you know what I'm talking about. The clear indication of a wet diaper we all recognize so well. I was relieved as he sat down in the Adirondack chair at the same time my cousin, his wife, and I all made it to the front door. After a hug goodbye they left, and I quickly made a beeline for the deck.
"Dude," I said. Mikey was opening his mouth to speak at the same time I was.
"You leaked," I said.
"I leaked," he said at the same time. We both burst out laughing.
"Do you think they noticed?" he asked me, his face turning red. I shook my head. "I don't know, Cwis," he told me, "she was hugging on me pretty hard. I think she grinded a little." I had to laugh - my cousins are very religious, and the very idea of my cousin's wife grinding on anyone was a little hard to imagine. I couldn't imagine if they knew that I was into a kinky fetish... omg! Ha.
"One thing I know they noticed was this," Mikey told me, pointing to last night's soaking wet diaper on the chair next to him.
"What makes you think that they noticed that?" I asked him. I'd been relieved that we seemed to have left no adult diapers out - at least the pacifiers, baby powder, and wipes could be explained away with an elaborate story if need be.
Mikey laughed.
"Because when we left it was on the ground in front of the door. And when I walked out here, it was on the chair..."
EEK!!!
Mikey and I sat out on the porch for more than an hour, talking about diapers, kinks, fetishes, and the need to keep them secret from the people who love you the most. Mikey was very introspective and, although he head no actual ABDL experience, Mikey summed up the issues related to it pretty succinctly.
"Did you ever wish you could just tell everyone in your family that you wish you could wear diapers?" he asked me. This dude had NO idea. I nodded. He laughed. "I know you wrote about wanting to be able to get diapers for Christmas when you were growing up," he told me. "I figured - "
I interrupted him.
"Dude... I wrote that in 2008. That was one of my first blog entries. How far back did you read?"
"I've read every entry," he told me, looking very serious for a moment. "I wanted to get to know who I was going to be coming to let toddlerize me." I had to laugh at his use of the term I've coined. I told him I didn't think he could read three years worth of entries in a few days, and he admitted that he'd been reading it for a long time. "But let's be fair - it hasn't been a full three years. You started in November 2008..."
I was impressed.
Mikey's bottom was thoroughly soaked now and he stood up and walked in front of me, putting his ass in my face. The wet spot had grown to fill the back of his jeans. These pants would need to be washed before I put dude on the bus, I thought. Mikey dropped his pants and stepped out of them, now in a very, very soaked diaper, and I had to laugh... his diaper had been pushed to its limits, and then some.
Actual photo below:
Mikey insisted that I take a picture of his ass and then show him, and once I did he couldn't stop laughing. He must have laughed for five minutes.
"What on earth did you put me in, Cwis?" he finally asked me. "And to think I was gonna flood this thing at the Chinese Buffet??? That would have been - humiliating."
For both of us, I thought. For both of us.
"And how did this not spill all over your cousin's feet?" he asked, giggling, and we both lost it.
Now it was changing time...
To Be Continued...
Up Next: The Spanking... The Tears... Cwis Gets Toddlerized... And The Goodbye.
