Baby Pictures: Baby Seth

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Happy Valentine's Day!

It's Valentine's Day, which I know is, for some of you, one of the toughest days of the year to be ABDL.

Because while the day's mascot is a little diaper-clad cutie who gets a free fucking pass to go out in public dressed only in a diaper AND shoot arrows at people - two things I know we'd all like to do - for many in our community there will be no romantic dinner at Luigi's, no box of chocolates, no dozen long-stemmed roses... you get the idea.

Some of us are homosexual, and struggle to find a partner in a less-than-friendly world.

Others are asexual... some are diapersexual... and some are straight-but-single this year.

So... if you are lucky enough to have a partner (spouse, boyfriend, girlfriend, or ABDL age-play partner) to share Valentine's Day with, enjoy the romance.

Do it up.

Represent for us all.

Today I'll be having a semi-romantic lunch with a hot Latino boy I'll call Felipe.

We'll enjoy an Italian lunch and some wine, and then go back to his place where some diapering, a little light spanking, and some scrumping will likely go down.

Then I'll jet before 5... his wife will be home and she'll be expecting some of the same, minus the diapers.

Sigh...

After a bunch of years of not giving a fuck about Valentine's Day I am starting to think I wouldn't mind if cupids arrow finally hit me.

2012 may just be the year. Just sayen.

I hope everyone enjoys their day. If you find any hot Cupid pics, email me!

Happy Valentine's Day!

Cwis

Valentine's Day Video - Must Watch

I found this Valentine's Day video that you simply must watch.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-QJ2Q4Tkm_Q&feature=youtube_gdata_player

Words can't even begin to describe. Be sure to watch it until the end for a special dance.

Happy Valentine's Day!

Dating Nightmares - Diaper Me?

Maybe he just was in that Cupid spirit?

http://www.mcall.com/news/local/white/mc-bw-valentines-day-20120213,0,3280312.column

COMING SOON: Community Spotlight

ANNOUNCING: AB/DL Community Spotlight!

Beginning Saturday, February 18th I will begin profiling members of the AB/DL community.

Like it or not, we ARE a community. We are a community made up of individuals.

Some members of our community have stepped up in big ways to make the community what it is. Some create, develop, and maintain websites where community members gather... others run merch sites or create clothing... some [ahem!] blog... the list goes on and on.

In the next few weeks I'll be profiling:

• a member who's been part of the community since the very beginning - and, in fact, created some of many of our first glimpses of what a diapered world would look like, via "pasties".

• a member who recently represented us on national television.

• a member who maintains a popular blog and does a bi-weekly video series.

I am looking to 'spotlight' many more members of our community. Are YOU someone who impacts the worldwide ABDL community in a positive way? Do you know someone worthy of being profiled? If so, I want to hear from you!

Email: abysitter@gmail.com.

To check out all of the 'spotlight' entries, click:

http://spotlight.abysitter.com

Needed: Graphic Designer

Sup!

I'm looking for a graphic designer for help with some graphics and illustrations for the blog and my upcoming Abysitter's Guide to ABDL.

Interested? Email me at abysitter@gmail.com. Be prepared to share a few examples of your work.

Discretion assured.

Thanks,

Cwis

Message - Revisited

I was looking through my blog analytics a few days ago, and was surprised to find my blog entry, "Message", has gotten the third-highest number of hits of all the entries I've written.

The #1 and #2 ("Looking for blog contributors!", February 14, 2010 and "Visiting Orlando? Let's hang... FAQs", February 15, 2010) are both from a full year before. The #4 blog entry is my Christmas entry from 2008, and #5 ("Baby Pictures: Shawn - Part II") is also from early 2010.

But the third most popular blog entry - and rising - is "Message".

And I'm glad about that, because of all the entries I've written, none mean more to me than this one.

I'm linking to it from the front page of my blog, again, for two reasons.

First, I have a TON of new blog readers. Many make me aware that they've read back months, even years. Some even claim to have read from start to finish. Still, this is blog entry number 517 since November 2008; it would be easy to miss one.

Second, following my recent entry on independence ("Do Unto Others..." February 7) I've had an outpouring of messages, both from abies who are wondering if they're the subject of my writings and from friends of abies who believe they have friends in our community who may be. I have heard some stories that saddened me, and I've talked to some abies and DLs who are pretty depressed about the situations they're in. Since I'm sure I've only heard from a fraction of those out there... "Message."

Please read... comment... and use the buttons at the very bottom of the entry to share.

Y'all really ARE dope as fuck...

http://abysitter.blogspot.com/2011/05/message.html

Jesterbaby: Jester's First Enema

[CWiS'S NOTE] Next up: a story from Jesterbaby. You may remember Jester's photoshoot from July 2011 - arguably one of the most popular I've ever posted - as well as several stories he posted around the same time. He's actually been contributing since then, but I've been holding on to his stories until the right time.

And here it is...

You'll see lots more from Jesterbaby in the future. Want to catch it all? Check out www.jesterbaby.abysitter.com.

Have a story YOU want to share? Email me [18+] at abysitter@gmail.com.

Jesterbaby: Jester's First Enema

When I was sixteen, right after I got my driver's license, I decided to take a trip to the outskirts of town to visit a medical supply store. Now, I have never done anything like this, nor have I ever been inside this store, so I was pretty nervous to go into the store.

On my shopping list today were diapers and an enema kit. I have always wanted to try an enema and since nobody else in town seemed to have one, I thought this would be the perfect place.

As I pulled into the parking lot I was trying to decide which card I would play and how I would go about buying the stuff on my shopping list without them thinking it was for me. As I was pretty young, I knew they would think it was weird for me to be buying stuff at a store like this.

My solution was a shopping list, I opened up a notepad on my phone and typed in enema kit and adult briefs. I thought, perfect, I will go inside and act like I am shopping for a disabled grandparent and they will be even happier to help me.

As I walked inside, I was quickly greeted by a nice lady in her mid forties. She was very friendly and she asked me politely if she could help me find anything. My first question was rather stupid, I said, "Can you pay with cash, or do you have to bill the insurance?" Her answer is what you would expect, although she wasn't rude about it and didn't show any signs of be arrogant or mean with her answer. Then, I continued and said I was shopping for my grandmother and that I had a shopping list of what I needed.

She was very pleased to help me, even when I said, "um, the first thing on my list is an enema kit (I said it as if I were actually asking what an enema kit was)." She answered, "Yes, they are right over here (she never really answered the question about what it was used, for, but that was perfectly fine in my book).

She handed me the box with the kit and then asked me what my second item was on my shopping cart. Now, my second item was even harder to tell her. I sort of stuttered when I said it, "Umm, I, I think I am looking for some adult briefs. I think they normally buy them online, but they ran out prematurely and asked me to get some while I was here." Now, her response was even worse than I expected. Saying, "not a problem, do you know what size you needed?" was even harder to answer because I didn't know how I would go about telling her. I was thinking, well, she is about my height, my weight, my build, in fact she looks exactly like me, but I knew that would just sound weird because I am pretty tall. She ended up responding to my puzzled look with, "Well, is she about my size (I thought she looked to be about the same size around as me)?" I decided to play along and I bent over, sort of checked out her waist and then I looked around at her butt, and replied, "Yep, that'll do."

So, she grabbed a bag and the enema kit and headed to the register. I pulled out an envelope that contained a fifty dollar bill and handed it to her. She cashed it, handed me back the change and gave me a receipt. I stuffed both the change and the receipt back into the envelope and took the stuff for my 'grandmom' and headed out. I thanked them about a dozen times before I left and when I got to my car, I through my stuff in the trunk and headed home.

When I got home, I was very eager to try on the diapers because they were a really cool peach colored and they actually looked like nice diapers. Unfortunately, they were too small for me, and I guess I miss measured how big she was. I should have known that I was wrong, but I was too nervous at the time to really care.

The enema worked well, however. I have never done one before, so this was my first. I pulled the package out, filled it with tap water (mistakenly, I know now to use filtered water, or distilled water) and then put the small package of castor oil in the bag and mixed it up. I was then able to get one of the diapers on, however, it is funny because that was the only time I ever got one to fit.

The enema was pretty interesting. I took the two liters without a problem and I had to go almost immediately. I decided that the best course of action would be to stand in the shower and release it, that way I wouldn't make a huge mess.

I was pretty surprised. I have seen videos of girls doing enemas and what not so, when I released it and it filled my diaper I was pretty happy with the results. That is, until orange liquid started to leak out of the back of my diaper. I was fairly worried that it was going to smell, but after I finished I decided that it wasn't as bad as poop normally smells like.

All in all, the experience was a lot of fun. I really enjoy that adrenaline rush I get when I purchase something of that nature. I also enjoy the part of getting to assume an alternative identity, even if it really doesn't matter. I actually went back to the store a couple days ago, however I didn't buy anything because they didn't have what I was looking for, but I did have a nice conversations about diapers with the guy that worked there (that is another story that I will tell about in the future). I really enjoy polite and friendly people and I can tell you that I feel much more comfortable talking to people who are friendly than people who just look at me and tell me my total.

Q&A: Dinobaby

[CWiS's NOTE]: Check out Dino's pictures in the entry below. 

As usual, I've posted this Q&A with as little editing as possible.

Name/nick name:  Dino/dinobaby  

Age: 22

City county/state/country: Newmarket on Fergus co clare ireland

AB/DL/BABYFUR/Other: I'd classify myself as abdl but leaning more towards the ab side of things as like all abs diapers are props in being a baby. I like diapers as well but not to get turned on by them.

Sexual orientation: Not sure so ill say bi.

When did you 1st realise you were abdl?

Dl side of things

I 1st got into the dl side of things when I was 12 or 13 when I happened to stumble across my disabled uncle whos in a wheelchair being changed out of a diaper. Then 1 day when he was at my house his bag with diapers in it was left in kitchen. Im not not sure why but I took 1 to wear it to see what it was like. When I did I discovered it gave me an erection which I didn't know at the time was an erection except it was a nice feeling it gave me. So whenever I would be at my grandfather house where my uncle lived id secretly steal or take some of his diapers and bring them upto my house and hide them and wear them so I would experience that turn-on feeling.

Ab side of things

I got Into the ab side of things when I was 18 shortly after my mam passed on. It was when I started looking up diaper stuff online that I came across my 1st abdl community site which was diaperspace. I set up an account on there and started discovering people who were wearing adult baby clothes and pacifiers and bottles. The more I looked at the pictures the more I wanted to try it so a few months later I ordered a sleeper and a nuk5 pacifier and it went from there with it.

After I started using the internet more as an adult I basically learnt that there were more people like me out there so I came to the conclusion I was and always will be an abdl.

What steps did you take to get your diaper 'fix' as a child and/or teen? 

Living in Ireland there isn't many shops or pharmacys /drugstores or other places that sell adult diapers or incontinence pads. And since I live in a small town and im rather shy id never resort to buying baby diapers. So every so often id go down to my grandfathers house and sneak into my uncles bedroom and take a few of his diapers never more than 5 at most as I didn't want to risk being caught. I found out where he got them from and it was through the Irish Health Board and often thought about how I could get them but never had the guts to go and ring about trying to get them. Id bring the diapers back to my house which is 2minutes away and hide them till later.

Do your parents and/or siblings know about you and diapers? If so please explain how they reacted.

I have no brothers or sisters so only my dad and 1 of my cousins and 1 of my aunts know im into the abdl stuff and accept me for it as long as I am safe and happy.

My dad knows about them and my love the abdl stuff. When I was bout to tell him something important he said I know and said it that its diaper. And that he doesn't mind as long as im happy and safe and to keep it not so much hidden but not to tell loads of people about it. He found out as after my mam passed on he became worried about me and started checking what I was looking at online when I wasn't around. He doesn't mind me doing it but at sametime im still shy about wearing diapers round him under my clothes im slowly getting used to it now. I have a sort of baby room in my mams house which I now own and live in and he helped me put it together with winnie the pooh curtains and furniture for clothes and shelves for my diapers and diapering supplies. I told him I want to put a crib on it and he said he will help me with it and other baby furniture as he made my crib as a baby and other furniture when we get round to it. Without him accepting it id find it hard to do or not comfortable. 

My aunt I told as I felt comfortable she would take it well and she did so im happy with it. She even baught me a winnie the pooh blanket for Christmas which was the 1st time any1 has gotten me anything babyish as an adult.

My cousin I told over face book as she was asking who I was going to visit in uk as I meet the person online. She was shocked and asked lots of questions about It I told her to google the word paraphelic infantilism. Like my aunt and dad shes ok with it as long as im safe and happy with what im doing.

Have you dealt with the shame and regret that is the  binge/purge cycle? Please explain

Im not sure if I would call this the binge/purge cycle. But I forgot bout diapers for a few years in my teenage years. As an a young adult I went trough the phase where I got bored of the online side of things like the abdl community sites but was still into and still into the abdl stuff but not so much the online side of things any more.

How has this affected your social life and/or dating? Married life? Parenting

It hasn't really affected  my social life as im mostly a loner and don't have many friends and they don't know about this side of my life.

I had 1 girl friend who I was in a relationship with which wasn't a sexual relationship. I told her about it she was shocked like most people she accepted me for it but never got involved with it. The most she would do is wash my baby clothes and when im putting on diaper she would get the stuff out. We would cuddle each other like most couples and she helped me mix baby formula when I decided to try it. Even though she was accepting off it I could never see the relationship going anywhere, as in order for me to be happy in a relationship id need someone to be more hands on with this side of my life or show more of an interest.

Some experts believe that we become the way we are because of traumas experienced at an early age, including abuse and/or neglect. Do your life experiences bear this out?

This is a difficult sort of question as so much has happened to me in life and ive seen a lot of bad stuff. I think im ab because of the way me and my mam were when she was alive as she would always cuddle me when we were on our town or if I got sad which I miss. I was never neglected as a kid but as a teenager I had to live with and see stuff which no teenager should ever see or a person should ever see. My mam was an alcoholic in my teenage years which eventually lead to her death. So living with her was hard. The abdl stuff is away for me to forget about the adult world sometimes and be happy and content. 

For the little dunces, please tell us about what it was like to discover this fetish/lifestyle on the internet. Please be at least 18 at the time of writing, but be specific about what age you discovered it, what sites helped you, and keep this part pg for obvious reasons.

Im not sure what age exactly it was but it was before I was 18 I used to search for diaper related stuff online whenever I was in an internet café and I came across deekers diaper page which I liked at the time, so that's how I knew there was people who liked diapers out there other than myself. I was 18 when I joined my 1st proper abdl community site which was diaper space it was trough diaper space I discovered I knew I liked the ab side of things and got into it a lot more. I eventually joined other abdl sites and discovered lots of fetishes which I like but will never come before my abdl side of life in terms of the fetish/abdl stuff.

Do your interests involve a subset of this community, such as baby furs, diaper disciplinarians, wet/messy, sissy babies etc.? please tell us about it. I wont even try and be specific here, just tell us what you think people should know.

I like different aspects of other abdl related stuff such as sissy babies and loads of different fetishes which I love but not something I will ever leave the abdl stuff behind to pursue an interest in. I love the sissybaby side of things as theres lots of colour involved with the clothes like lots of pinks and purples which are some of my favourite colours. I like wearing some sissy baby clothes but will always consider myself a baby boy with girl tendencies like wearing dresses and pink plastic and ruffled panties sometimes but not all the time. The only way id ever get into sissy baby stuff more than the baby boy stuff is if I had someone to share it with. The sissy baby stuff gets boring more than the boy stuff I find when your by yourself.

Being in Ireland its difficult to meet abdl people and fetish people who tolerate the abdl stuff. Ive only meet 1 person who would dress me and treat me like a girl baby and that person is in the uk who I will hopefully be visiting regularly the more we get to know each other.

Other fetishes I like and tried a few times and would love to try others but nothing extreme or 2weird and dangerous as I don't like much pain only light to moderate pain. Most of the fetishes im interested in will always remain a fantasy for me.

What % of your sexual activities and/or masturbation incorporate diapers? Has this caused problems for you?

In terms of sexual activities im still a virgin and not bothered bout sex or masturbation.

I never masturbate in diapers or masturbate in general which sounds strange, but I get bored of it easy. I touch my penis and balls but never actually masturbate. If I get hard I tend to ignore it and let it die down, my hard penis. Only time ive ever seen myself cum is when Im half asleep or when I change my underwear after ive been hard and squirted in my pants.

A few things I would like to add is being in Ireland its hard to meet other abdl people as most are shy and don't want to meet up as they are scared. Sometimes it can be depressing wearing diapers and doing other baby stuff when you aren't actually able to meet other abdl folks on a regular basis as the vast majority of people into it are in america and other parts of the world. My abdl friend who I visited in the uk has revived my interest in the abdl stuff a lot and making me realise that just because I don't meet any abdl people here doesn't mean its not fun as long as I have him in my life even tough hes in the uk. This person is basically my ab daddy. 

People who are reading this and have seen me on abdl sites: the only reason im not active much in the abdl community site side of things anymore is cause I have found what I am looking for which was a daddy even though he is in the uk. But I can visit him regularly compared to other daddys on the other side of the world. The other reason I left that community site stuff is cause I tend to get wrapped up in them easily and have been let down by lots of people and used by some of them. One day I may become as active as I was in them before, but not for the forseable future. For now I will stick with 1 site which I will use regularly, which is fetlife.

My long-term plan with the abdl stuff is to get my baby room finished with crib and to wear diapers 24/7 and reverse my potty training so i need diapers. Even though I dont wear 24/7 now I wear alot during college courses, as i cant sit down when out for hours on end without needing to pee as i feel myself ready to burst. 

I am hoping to meet more abdl people as time goes on, as well and do some travelling. im not sure what in terms of a relationship as i am not sure whether im bi or gay or straight, all i know is im not ready for kids in life as i am a kid deep down and it wouldnt be fair for me to bring a kid into this world with me being an abdl as it would be hard to hide my abdl feelings. And i dont want to hide them or give them up ever. (Also, the person i be with long term would need to understand this is who i am and always will be.)

Thanks for taking the time to read this any questions i can be found on fetlife as dinobaby.

Baby Pictures: Dinobaby

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In the News: Diapering in Miami Just Got Easier...

Special thanks to an alert Southern Florida reader who sent me a link to this article. I am in full support of Miami adding diaper changing tables to the men's rooms throughout their city. As my friend says: "Daddies need to change diapers too..."

Carollo's victory: Diaper changing stations coming to Miami men's rooms - Miami-Dade - MiamiHerald.com

http://www.miamiherald.com/2012/02/06/2627594/carollos-victory-diaper-changing.html

Do Unto Others...

In the past two weeks I have been hit up by six or more members of our community regarding the possibility of donating pictures for my blog. Most of them hit me up after reading my blog, which I always appreciate. But after telling me that they were interested in having their pictures appear, four of the six then went on to tell me that they first had to get permission from someone: a daddy, "family" member/s, or a partner (in one case a boyfriend, and in the other case a girlfriend).

While I sometimes find it cute that a person engages in role-play, and has to ask their daddy for permission to do this or do that, before you offer to submit pictures to a blog or website, perhaps asking your daddy first would be the right order to do it. I work full-time, have an active social life, and try to Pamp up on a regular basis. This blog takes a lot of my time, and being a part of your role-play experience takes away from that. But that's just me...

[Note: this doesn't apply if I hit you up and you want to solicit the advice of someone, or make sure it won't be a problem for whoever you are in a relationship with, before you commit to allowing your photos to be used somewhere. That is understandable, and a different situation entirely. But please, don't hit me up regarding showcasing your pictures if you are going to just involve me in a role-play scenario or are doing it to try to make someone else jealous. And I say this knowing full well that it will probably result in at least one or two people saying they weren't able to get permission to share pictures on my blog. If that is the case, so be it.]

But I digress.

I'm actually writing this entry for a different reason. It involves the ownership/possession issue, and it is an entry that people have requested that I write for a long time.

You see, I get hit up on a fairly regular basis from members of our community who are upset about one thing or another.

If a 'diaper group' kicks one diaperboy out of the 'house', they hit me up. It's almost guaranteed.

If a 'family' has a member that is dissatisfied with something - anything - I get an email or a text message.

I even get messages from people who were in happy relationships that were ruined by nurserywreckers from within our community, lol.

A lot of times the people who message me want to meet up for some babysitting to soothe their hurt feelings.

Or they just want to talk.

Sometimes they just want revenge, to sell out the secrets that the people they were formerly associated with probably would rather nobody know.

I listen. I give advice. And then I tell them to chill out, and be patient.

Because if there is one thing I have learned about relationships within the ABDL community, it is that they don't last long... or, they last forever.

In the past few months I've gotten messages from people within our community who are upset because they feel like some members of our community lack the ability to be independent.

And, to a degree, I agree with them.

They remember my blog posts from my MySpace blog, where I talked about my experiences randomly messaging people in communities I was traveling in back in 2006.

I met a lot of dope-ass diaperboys, and did a fair amount of sitting on my road trip.

But I was also frustrated by several messages from people who expressed the inability to meet up without first obtaining permission from a certain daddy, or a group.

I was new to the ABDL community at the time, having had most of my 80 or so diapering experiences with people who aren't really into diapers.

I didn't know how it works, and each message that I received made me wonder if some of the people that I was speaking with were... differently-abled?

Slow? I don't know how else to say it.

Who can't meet up with someone without obtaining other people's permission?!

I came to the conclusion that some of the members of our community I was communicating with were just role-playing. But a few others really didn't have the penis to stand on their own two feet. And that made me sad.

What really made me sad was, I got messages from several people who told me they couldn't hang out unless I met other members of their group. Later, when they were cast off from said group following an episode of diaper drama, they hit me up, all excited and ready to chill. Uh, no thanks.

It also made me sad because I became friends with a collegebaby who seemed like one of the most intelligent and self-assured people I'd ever spoken with in the community. We were friends on Facebook and shared phone calls and text messages for months; following a period of almost a week in which I didn't hear from him I went to Facebook and found that I'd been deleted. He had joined a diaper group which had 'rules' - one of them being no consorting outside of the group without permission. To say I was disappointed is an understatement.

And it also made me sad because I moved to a new city and almost immediately began hanging out with a friend who I've featured in the blog before. He is adorable, funny, and a loyal-as-fuck friend. Other people saw that, and were jealous of our friendship. Instead of just talking to him like he was an individual, an independent person capable of forming his own thoughts, the people who were messaging him did everything in their power to try to insinuate that he was under my control, and should hang out with their 'group' so that he could experience their brand of community. Before he could do that, though, he had to end our friendship. Rules, you see. So my little nug Vuk, for whom loyalty is ultra-important - the kid has separation anxiety and abandonment issues - took to sharing chatlogs and conversations with me that gave me some real insight into what members of our "community" consider that word to be.

Our community often consists of control. Controlling daddies, and boys who are desperate to be controlled.

But that is how a lot of our community is. We are desperate to make that ABDL connection, and when we do, some of us will actually allow others among us to tell us what we can and can't do. Some of us even prefer to live our lives this way.

I know this not only because of my own experiences, but because I have gotten emails from a number of people who belong to different groups or cliques. They are looking for something different, for a fresh start, for something new. They've read my blog, or they know how I used to do the Pampers-for-pay thing, and they hit me up with proposals: they will move to Orlando, cut ties with this daddy or that group leader, and follow whatever rules I give them.

That's a cute idea in theory, but in practice I don't think I would be able to handle it.

Don't get me wrong: I would love to have a full-time baby.

But by "full-time" I mean someone for whom our lifestyle is a major, or the major, part of their life. But not the ONLY part of their life.

I value loyalty just like anyone else does.

But I value freethinking and independence just as much.

If you want to meet me, I will never insist that you also meet any other person to give the okay.

I will never have to ask permission to hang out with you.

Nobody will make me feel guilty for being your friend.

I don't tolerate that bullshit.

And everyone in my life knows it.

And, I am looking for people like me.

I find people who are able to act on their own to be such a turn-on.

When Vuk declined an invite to meet someone because they'd told him that I was chatting with them on Yahoo talking shit about him - while I was actually sitting next to him watching the chat all the while - it was one of my proudest moments as a member of the ABDL community.

But that incident really underscores what our community can be: controlling, devious, underhanded, scheme-y... insert a whole list of negative words here, but I'm sure you get the idea.

I know that there are groups of positive people within our community pocketed all across the United States. I have talked to people who have told me that the groups that get together in their cities are one of the most positive aspects of their lives. I have been invited to events in Atlanta, Dallas, Chicago, Philly, and a few other cities. And with these invites came no requirements... no requirement that I meet a controlling member of the group first, nothing. Just a group of people who like to socialize in diapers, and like to invite others in.

That's what's up.

But I am well aware that, in many other cities, there are groups which revolve around control. Cliques, really. Once you're in, you must cut ties to the other people in your ABDL life. And getting out is kind of like leaving the mafia lol... you only leave in a cardboard Huggies box.

So I do my best to determine whether the people I am reaching out to are independent, or need to be dependent.

Often it is not easy to tell.

But I will tell you this.

There is nothing more of a turn on then an independent collegebaby who is not only capable of running his own life, but who insists upon it.

I have been very lucky to meet a number of young men like this.

One of my friends is a college student who travels all across the country. I have been fortunate enough to have him visit me here in Orlando. I know he loves to roleplay, but the idea of him ever needing to get permission before he can come see me again is as far-fetched is anything I can think of.

Another of my friends works in the airline industry as a pilot. He visits Orlando on a regular basis, and I've had more than my fair share of abysitting sessions. He is forever railing against the number of people he has almost met who stood him up because, at the last minute, they couldn't obtain permission from someone. And this has happened to him in cities across the country, so it's pretty much nationwide. The idea of him ever telling me he needed to get permission to visit is ludicrous.

I also have a close friend who is a member of a diaper group, and has been ordered not to associate with people outside of the group without permission. We have hung out many times on his visits to my hometown, but as often as he's posed in adorable diaper poses, we can't do pictures because he is afraid that he will anger others. This is a turnoff, but I tolerate it because he's so fucking adorable. Lol.

And a few weeks ago I babysat a hot straightboy, a freshman from the local university. It turns out he'd already had the chance to talk to others in the area before me, but one of the people he talked with had talked to him about expectations that he would have for him if he was allowed him to attend some sort of group event that was coming up in Florida.

"What is this dude, my fucking father?" he asked me. "I came to school five hours away from home so I could get away from rules, not have more."

I spanked him for swearing, and gave him all kinds of rules for the day. But he must've mentioned five or six times that his expectations were that any rules he was required to follow would only last as long as our session.

And then, my friends, is what I like.

So as much as I appreciate a loyal friend, and as much as I would like to have that daddy-type relationship, it could never happen with someone who was not able to stand on their own two feet.

Now that I've ranted and raved, it's time to explain why I am really writing this entry.

[Note: If you read this far, you really deserve a special prize. I wish I could give you something through the blogosphere. But I can't, so I'll just give you more blog entry... keep reading.]

Within the last month or two I have been hit up by community members with a variety of different grapes.

• One was upset because he had sent a message to an ex-boyfriend and had not gotten a reply. After messaging him one or two more times, worried, the DL finally got back to him - to let him know that he was not allowed to write anymore, because the ex's new boyfriend did not approve. My friend was understandably upset, because he had considered them friends even after the breakup.

• Another was upset because he had made special flight arrangements for a layover in a city where he was supposed to be met by someone he'd spent a lot of time talking to on FetLife. He had traded in some of his frequent flyer miles to make these arrangements. When he arrived he spent the night in the next day alone in a hotel room. It wasn't until he returned home that the person he was supposed to meet apologized. It turned out that person's "daddy" had gotten upset upon learning that his "son" was going to meet up with another AB his own age, and that the "daddy" hadn't been invited. He explained to my friend that he wasn't allowed to call him because he had been "grounded for breaking daddy's rules."

WTF?

The kicker was that these two had talked for more than a year, and the daddy had never been mentioned.

• A third was upset because he had been talking to someone in his hometown for a long time. Over the summer, that person had joined a group/family/clique in a whole nother city. His friend had recommended that he try to "get in" too - so that they could continue to hang out. My friend was offended, understandably.

• Another felt that he had a special dad/son relationship with someone. He had paid for the young person to fly out to visit him several times, and even paid for things like his cell phone. It probably should have been obvious to him that he was being used, but it wasn't until someone blew up the kids situation on a message board: he had a different "daddy" in several cities - and they were all, combined, bankrolling the operation.

• Yet another messaged me, extremely disappointed, because some of his ABDL friends were planning a trip to a convention, and had not invited him to go. He was just looking for advice on whether he should ask to join them, foot the bill for the trip on his own, or avoid it altogether. But I got a sense of how disappointed he was, and how his identity was really tied into the identity of the people he considered his friends in this community.

• Finally, I talked to a young AB who called my phone at 3 a.m. one morning, over and over until I answered. Wtf? I was highly annoyed at first, but the kid was sobbing and we talked for a few hours. His situation was simple: he had had a number of friends in a group in his city, and considered them his brothers, the best friends he'd ever had. Earlier that night he had gone into a chat room without logging in - the chat room showed "guest" - and it stayed in for thirty minutes while some of the others made fun of him. Worse, they were planning a weekend trip, and someone had told the group not to tell him or another member of the group.

"I feel like I lost my family," he told me. He went on to explain that he lost his real family around his junior year of high school, when they had kicked him out after finding out he was gay, and this had basically been a replacement for him. "How can I ever trust them again?"

I have actually gotten other messages a lot like these in past months and years as well. But so many coming so close together made me realize that our community has a real problem.

It's a problem of a need for dependency. A problem of lack of independence. A problem of loyalty. Maybe a problem of all of the above?

For those who are less independent, more easily controlled, and desperately in need of a sense of community, the problem is probably unnoticeable.

But for anyone who's ever invested time and energy into a diaper-based friendship only to find it undermined by the other person's [insert controllable quality here], it sucks.

It happened to me four years ago, and from the messages I get I can say it happens often.

I'm sure there are way more messages that I haven't gotten, which makes me wonder how many times this has happened to people who haven't complained.

What is it about people in our community that makes it so easy for them to screw over other people?

Why do some members of our community feel such a desperate need to control others?

Why do some members of our community have such a desperate longing to be controlled?

Is belonging to a group of people who share your love for diapers so important that you are willing to flush your values down the toilet?

From the messages I get, it kind of seems like it.

And that sucks.

Think about whether YOU are someone who could be the "other person" in any of the scenarios above.

If you are, examine your character.

Both your ABDL character, and your character as a person.

Or, at the very least, evaluate the character of those you call a "community."

And hey... if you read the scenarios above and you thought "Damn, some people have problems..." good for you!

And if you are a collegebaby, or a college-aged DL, who is able to be independent, and has some self-assurance and enough self-esteem to get through life on your own terms... HIT ME UP! I want to hear from you.

You guys are what makes our "community" great.

I've been lucky enough to meet a few dozen of you, and I look forward to meeting many more.

There is nothing hotter than a collegebaby with independence, drive, ambition, and ideals.

And if you are a loyal friend but treat other people - all people - nicely, that is a turn-on, too.

- Cwis
abysitter@gmail.com

Coming Soon: Dinobaby

COMING TOMORROW: Photos and a Q & A from Dinobaby, a 22 year old ABDL from County Claire, Ireland.
Dino took the time to answer a series of questions I've posed to you all in great detail. He's also sent along some recent 'baby' pics, with a promise to snap some more in the near future.

WANT TO BE FEATURED HERE? 18+ only. Email me at abysitter@gmail.com and I'll forward you the questions. Everyone's welcome, so don't be shy... even if we've never talked, I'd love to hear from you. And if you've sent pictures before, or guest written for me, don't wait for an invitation to do so again... hit me up today!!

In The Absence of a Picture, It's Story Time...

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