RIP Charles

My heart is broken after hearing the news that a little dude - hmm, stray bitch puppy twink? - and long-time friend of so many of us in the community has passed away. 

Whether you knew him as 'Charles' or 'Charlie' - or knew him by his online persona, Sean Michael Bradley - this kid was, in all ways, dope as fuck. 

I first met Charlie through a mutual friend - online for me, real-life for Charlie. They were readers of my first blog - the MySpace blog that pre-dated this one, and Charlie followed my 'road trip' with great interest, even locating interesting things for me to do as I traveled from north to south. They were mostly things that a young kid would find interesting, and things that really didn't interest me at all, but it was cute watching him try to tailor his picks to what he figured an older person's personality might be, mostly without success. 

Years and years ago Charlie wrote a 'bio' for me, on the hopes of one day coming to Orlando for a visit. An excerpt from it: 

"I’m a very loving person. If I like someone, I would practically take a bullet for them. But also if I don’t like someone, I wont waste my time dealing with them. I’m an adventurous person. My goal in life is to experience everything that a person can experience. I love thrills. Adrenaline is my favorite thing. I have a fairly good sense of humor. And love humor. I’m messy and disorganized..." 

If you knew Charlie, so many things in that paragraph will jump out at you. 

Charlie did eventually make it to Orlando, and although our circumstances were such that spending much time together wouldn't work out, he kept in regular contact. 

When we finally met it was at a particularly low moment for him - so low that I felt that mixing diapers with the conversation we were about to have wouldn't be wise, almost felt like I'd be taking advantage. 

The conversation we had, though, was without a doubt one of the deepest and most meaningful I have ever had with someone in our community - it was illuminating af, and I'll be forever indebted to him for opening my eyes to some things. 

Charlie left Orlando shortly afterward, and in the years since never hesitated to remind me that I could have diapered him but didn't. 

Through twists and turns, and ups and downs, over the years I'd hear from him. When he launched his website, he sent me a message demanding editing services. When our mutual crush made a career move, Charlie would keep me apprised. And when he'd make changes himself, from living arrangements to school to - well, whatever - I'd get a text message from Charlie. 

No matter where he lived, Los Angeles was home. Charlie loved living in LA, and spent so much time trying to sell me and others on a move to the area. 

Much of what he loved was the community there. He was surrounded by amazing ABDLs - "and drama-free!" he'd remind me often. "You'd love it here!" He talked up his area and our community there so often that you might have thought he worked for the tourism advisory board. 

"I always try and convince people to move out here," he told me. "We got more bounce in California then all you all combined!" 

When someone from our community leaves us, they leave behind who they were online. Their photos and thoughts are preserved on the websites we knew them on. 

And, if we're lucky, they leave behind memories of conversations that likely ran much deeper than most of our conversations with 'vanillas' have. 

I've spent some time this morning reading old emails, scrolling through Facebook messages, and revisiting conversations. 

There are never enough of those. So today, in Charlie's memory, I hope you'll reach out to someone in the community you haven't talked to for a while. 

Waking up to the news that this amazing kid is no longer with us is sobering af - and that could be any one of us tomorrow. Re-kindle a connection with someone. 

RIP, Charlie.